Apparently there exists a thing, in the wild, called a fucking boppy. Wait, it gets so much better than the name.
So yeah, it’s a thing you lay, wedge, stick a child on, in or over so they can sit, stand or crumple into a drooling spineless ball and giggling happiness.
I am the dad. I know what networking stuff is, what tool and car stuff is. I even know baking, bedding and housecleaning stuff. I had no friggin idea what a boppy was so, I did what any other self respecting dad would do in these situations… I asked someone else.
After the laughter had ceased, I went back to your mom and asked her why she was laughing at me. Our (collective of 5 other brothers and sisters) number four walked into the room. She is going to be the one I have to pry you away from, walked in and told me what a boppy was. She apparent, at age 17, knows what the hell this thing is. As if being upstaged by a donut-shaped cushion and smarmy teenage girl wasn’t emasculating enough, we went on a journey through ETSY (a site where people make and sell shit that sometimes should not be sold to the public, or worn out in it for that matter) to see all the boppy covers that you can purchase as “accessories” to the aforementioned donut pillow.
Now, as a tech dad, super nerd and all around awesomest human you’ll see when you finally arrive (dont tell mom, she’ll be so mad at me) I to have a tendency to accessorize things. The gun has it’s own accessories, as does the ‘dadmobile’, A.K.A Jeep along with the XBOX and the TVs, well you get the point… I accept the need to accessorize things as a sign and awesomeness and a certain right of passage. But a donut pillow? Really?
Dad’s first rule of ‘dadconomic’ (yes that is a thing) never pay the same price OR MORE for the cover of something. For instance – if the boppy is $49.00 then the cover of the boppy should be no more than say, $19.95 on the outside! But when the cover of said boppy is $51.99, I have to say, hell no!
Dadconomics is a real thing, but you won’t care much about that until much later in life. Right now, you’re growing limbs according to the video I saw today. You look just like your mom (I’m kidding).
There lies another bizarre contraption that we’re looking into as well. I think it’s called the bumpy or some such thing. It’s the sitting up version of the boppy and allows you to slouch in just the right places once you’re able to hold your own head up. So, I’m guessing that wont be for a few weeks or more since you look like a tadpole now and head-holding appears to be an advance skill as yet undeveloped.
Well – I just wanted to check in and say I love you, Bean. Hope the growing is going well and you finding life at this time more enjoyable than those of us on the outside of the womb. Quarantine is starting to really suck, although I talk to all your siblings on a regular basis and everyone is healthy and staying as sane as they can for now.
We love you – you five+ week old tadpole looking human. 🙂
